i have to sincerely thank a songstress for reintroducing Mr. Bobby Darin back into my life. I used to listen to him when my grandfather used to drive me around in the country in his brown 1978 ford pickup truck. he’s got a voice, a sense about his words that fits me. tomorrow i”ll post another band that i’ve fallen in love with.
He died during the surgery even though he still lives. He is a shell and everything we have loved about him is a faint memory. I drive east against the failing sun somehow hoping to speed up time and end this day. I’ve been feeling increasingly hollow emotionally and it’s driven me to drive. Further away from my life. I know I have to go back as I watch the sky darkens more after the sun fades away over the skyline. It sets as I sit parked facing west. That’s where my future, our futures lies. Just over the horizon, just beyond reach. I have been feeling my regrets lately and they weigh on me. Everyone can forgive me and I can start being ok with being alone but I can’t forgive myself. It isn’t as much depression as it is guilt that hangs over my shoulders like a heavy cloud.